Battle Off The Ice: Casey Borer Versus Bobby Goepfert
By KP Kelly
Casey Borer and Bobby Goepfert have history. They played together at St. Cloud State University, spent time together while playing for the Charlotte Checkers, and exchange the occasional chirp on Twitter. So, I decided to place these guys against each other in a battle of wits. Ok, really the idea came from the Newlywed Game, but that sounds girlie. We will stick with the battle of wits. Which player knows the other better?
In the actual Newlywed Game, you gain points as a team against other duos. Since we aren’t going up against anyone else, we will award 2 points for each correct answer from the guesser and 1 point awarded for the person with the matching answer. They switch roles, so it all works out in the end. I think…
You may learn more about Borer’s career in my past birthday tribute and check back with Cardiac Cane on May 9th to learn more about Mr. Goepfert in his upcoming birthday salute.
Here is Round One. These questions regarding Mr. Borer and Mr. Geffman is trying to correctly guess the answer. Let’s see how he did…
1. If Casey Borer were a contestant on a game show, would he be on…
A. The Bachelor
B. Man vs Wild
C. The X Factor
Bobby Goepfert Guess: Man vs Wild. The only problem with him being on that show, would be that it would never end. You say, “Hey Casey, we are dropping you Boreal forest to show people how to survive for a week.” Six years later, the moose population in northern Canada is depleted, and there is some sort of a woodland society built by his rugged hands. You see, the name of that show confuses Casey. He is not sure if he is the Man or if he is the Wild…probably somewhere in between.
Casey Borer Answer: Man vs Wild
SCORE: 2 points awarded to Geffman and 1 point to Borer
2. What bad habit does Casey Borer need to stop?
BG: He refuses to cook his venison.
CB: I should stop going on Facebook.
SCORE: No point. The netminder retains the lead 2-1.
3. What would Casey say was the most memorable moment from St. Cloud?
BG: Too many to count. To be vague, any time we swept a team, beat the Gophers, Saturday nights after a game. If I am going inside his head, he will say something very political, like fishing with the boys, hunting with the boys, or just the “Gosh darn dang good times we y’all had as a group. Hyuck.” No, but seriously, playing in St. Cloud while we were there was great and to pick one moment out randomly is tough.
CB: Bobby Goepfert’s post win dances in the locker room.
SCORE: Ok, clearly tough question, one point awarded to both. Geffman-3, Borer-2
4. If Borer weren’t playing hockey, what would be his profession?
BG: Sheriff’s Deputy in a small town. The real Sheriff is an older corrupt individual who knows his time is almost up so he is trying to make an extra buck here and there. Casey sees this and doesnt approve. Having the respect by the townsfolk and seeing them being taken advantage of, Casey contemplates whether to confront his mentor or bide his time and take the reins of justice and clean up the once beautiful town that became dirty. I smell Hollywood around the corner….
CB: I would love to be either a baseball player or a fishing/hunting guide.
SCORE: Ok, so no match, but I have to give Geffman a point for vivid commentary. Geffman-4, Borer-2
5. What drink best describes Casey Borer?
A. Shirley Temple
B. Sex on the Beach
C. Draft Beer
D. Jägerbomb
BG: Beer on Tap. Tall boy. If you see half the glass not full, start pouring another one. Dark, tasty lager brewed from the Midwest, sprinkled with the sweat and tears of the working man. Keeps his upper lip untrimmed so he can lick it in the morning and somewhat eat the hair of the dog. (no pun intended)
CB: I think a Bud heavy pretty much sums it up.
SCORE: I’ll give them the match. 2 points for Bobby, one for Casey. Geffman-6, Borer-3
6. What magazine bests describes Wild Borer?
A. Rolling Stones
B. PlayGirl
C. Seventeen
D. Men’s Health
BG: Men’s Health. He looks through the pages and laughs. Ripped muscles of guys drinking soy milk and putting in 6 minutes on the Shake Weight? Haha. Sure you can’t see Casey’s oblique’s with the Hubble telescope, but he sucks milk from a cows utter every morning before the cock crows and can hold a side bridge for days.
CB: Rolling Stone I think. I am a sucker for the gossip magazines, though I like In Touch or US Weekly, or whatever they are…the ones with Snooki and people like that on the cover.
SCORE: No goal! I mean no point.
After Round One, the final score is Goepfert 6, Casey Borer 3. Be sure to come back tomorrow for Geffman’s questions (and picture) and Borer’s guesses. May the best man win.
I want to give a huge thanks to these two swell guys. I bugged them for this ridiculous idea at the end of their respective seasons and hounded them into their precious off-seasons. To add injury to insult, I gave them crazy-silly questions and answers, but they didn’t back out. Thank you Mr. Wild Borer. Thank you Mr. Geffman. This is why you will forever have Caniacs cheering you on!
You can always find us on Facebook at CardiacCane. Engage in interesting hockey discussions with us on Twitter: @Esbee92, @CardiacCaneFS, @peacelovepuck, @caniac176 and @CaniacCaz. Also, be sure to send some love to Bobby Goepfert and Casey Borer on Twitter.