If The Carolina Hurricanes Were a 90’s TV Show

BUFFALO, NY - NOVEMBER 14: Hurricanes players congratulate Carolina Hurricanes defenseman Dougie Hamilton (19) on winning goal during the Carolina Hurricanes and Buffalo Sabres NHL game on November 14, 2019, at KeyBank Center in Buffalo, NY. (Photo by John Crouch/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)
BUFFALO, NY - NOVEMBER 14: Hurricanes players congratulate Carolina Hurricanes defenseman Dougie Hamilton (19) on winning goal during the Carolina Hurricanes and Buffalo Sabres NHL game on November 14, 2019, at KeyBank Center in Buffalo, NY. (Photo by John Crouch/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)
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BUFFALO, NY – NOVEMBER 14: Hurricanes players congratulate Carolina Hurricanes defenseman Dougie Hamilton (19) on winning goal during the Carolina Hurricanes and Buffalo Sabres NHL game on November 14, 2019, at KeyBank Center in Buffalo, NY. (Photo by John Crouch/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images)
BUFFALO, NY – NOVEMBER 14: Hurricanes players congratulate Carolina Hurricanes defenseman Dougie Hamilton (19) on winning goal during the Carolina Hurricanes and Buffalo Sabres NHL game on November 14, 2019, at KeyBank Center in Buffalo, NY. (Photo by John Crouch/Icon Sportswire via Getty Images) /

The average age of the Carolina Hurricanes is 25, so who would the Canes be if they were a popular TV show from their childhood?

All of the Canes, except for our beloved Andrei Svechnikov, were born before the turn of the century. With the average age of the Canes being around 25 years old, most of the guys grew up watching beloved hit 90’s shows like Friends and The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air. So, what show would the Canes be if we had to compare them to a hit 90’s show? That 70’s show!

That 70’s show, believe it or not, was hit 90’s show. It was a fun and goofy show with a couple of life lessons hidden among all of the jokes. That description perfectly fits this Bunch of Jerks.

The Carolina Hurricanes love to have fun, both on and off the ice, and with a bunch of different personalities, they actually get along wonderfully. So, let’s dive in and have some fun, and see who matches whom from the show.

Goofball Tandem Duo

Wilmer Valderrama and Danny Masterson from “That 70’s Show” get caught by KISS security during concert (Photo by Annamaria DiSanto/WireImage)
Wilmer Valderrama and Danny Masterson from “That 70’s Show” get caught by KISS security during concert (Photo by Annamaria DiSanto/WireImage) /

Ah yes, Fez and Hyde. These two are best buddies on That 70’s show. Often they were at the center of the jokes, making fun of each other, and getting into trouble together. Probably the two most loved characters on the show, as they did make it ten times funnier.

You must be wondering: who in the world couple fit the description of best buddies, funny, always pranking each other?

THAT’S RIGHT, you guessed it! Our beloved Dougie Hamilton and Andrei Svechnikov are Hyde and Fez.

Is it a coincidence that Hamilton has curly hair and Svechnikov has an adorable accent just like Hyde and Fez, respectively? Nope. These goofballs love each other, and share a bond that cannot be broken. Just like the show characters are famous for, not only scoring, but their friendly antics with each other. Most recently, Hamilton broke out the age-old banana phone during Svechnikov’s post-game interview.

There isn’t much else to say, really. That 70’s Show wouldn’t be nearly as great without Hyde and Fez and the same goes for the Canes! Where would we be without these two buddies? It would be a boring time in Raleigh, for sure.

Mr. Funny Guy, Mr. Handsome. Who would be Michael Kelso?

LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA – MAY 29: Ashton Kutcher testifies during the trial of alleged serial killer Michael Gargiulo, known as the “Hollywood Ripper,” at the Clara Shortridge Foltz Criminal Justice Center on May 29, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. Gargiulo is facing murder charges, including the February 21, 2001 stabbing death of Kutcher’s friend Ashley Ellerin. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images)
LOS ANGELES, CALIFORNIA – MAY 29: Ashton Kutcher testifies during the trial of alleged serial killer Michael Gargiulo, known as the “Hollywood Ripper,” at the Clara Shortridge Foltz Criminal Justice Center on May 29, 2019 in Los Angeles, California. Gargiulo is facing murder charges, including the February 21, 2001 stabbing death of Kutcher’s friend Ashley Ellerin. (Photo by Frederick M. Brown/Getty Images) /

Up next on the chopping block: Michael Kelso, played by Ashton Kutcher. Why the picture with the mustache you ask? It will all make sense in a minute.

Michael Kelso was the funniest part of That 70’s Show. Also recognized as rather handsome, Kelso stole the hearts of millions with his role on this show. Every line on the show made you laugh and you just couldn’t take your eyes off of him. Now, who could this possibly be from the Canes?

RALEIGH, NC – NOVEMBER 23: Jordan Martinook #48 of the Carolina Hurricanes acknowledges the crowd during a post game interview after scoring a hat trick during an NHL game against the Florida Panthers on November 23, 2018 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images)
RALEIGH, NC – NOVEMBER 23: Jordan Martinook #48 of the Carolina Hurricanes acknowledges the crowd during a post game interview after scoring a hat trick during an NHL game against the Florida Panthers on November 23, 2018 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images) /

THAT’S RIGHT, you know him, we love him! Mr. Jordan Martinook, or often called Marty Party.

Related Story. Carolina Hurricanes: Jordan Martinook is Irreplaceable. light

Martinook is the heart and soul of this team. Does he score a lot? No. But giving this man the “A” on his jersey was 110% the right call from the coaches.

Jordan Martinook leads with soul and heart, and if you don’t follow him on twitter be sure to do so. He always has a smile, is always yelling and making everyone laugh. There are leaders by example, by voice, but Martinook leads by spirit. This guy never quits, and always has a positive outlook. Every team needs a Martinook, but nobody can replace the OG Marty Party.

The dad of the group, Mr. Normal, was always Eric Foreman, so which Cane is Eric?

Story is about Topher Grace, and how he’s made the transition from the goofy guy on ‘ That 70’s Show’ to leading man in “In Good Company,” for a Sunday Calendar feature story. Photographed at Four Seasons hotel, Beverly Hills. (Photo by Spencer Weiner/Los Angeles Times via Getty Images)
Story is about Topher Grace, and how he’s made the transition from the goofy guy on ‘ That 70’s Show’ to leading man in “In Good Company,” for a Sunday Calendar feature story. Photographed at Four Seasons hotel, Beverly Hills. (Photo by Spencer Weiner/Los Angeles Times via Getty Images) /

Every friend group has a “dad” or someone who is always responsible. Eric was that guy in That 70’s Show. Since he was always hounded by his father to be a good kid, Eric almost always did the right thing. Every now and then, he would break out of his shell and try something new, but for the most part was the awkward guy who always did the right thing.

So to match this to a Canes player, who on the roster is most responsible?

CHICAGO, IL – SEPTEMBER 6: Jaccob Slavin of the Carolina Hurricanes poses for a portrait for the NHL Player Media Tour on September 6, 2019 in Chicago, Illinoios. (Photo by Brian Babineau/NHLI via Getty Images)
CHICAGO, IL – SEPTEMBER 6: Jaccob Slavin of the Carolina Hurricanes poses for a portrait for the NHL Player Media Tour on September 6, 2019 in Chicago, Illinoios. (Photo by Brian Babineau/NHLI via Getty Images) /

Mr. Responsible for the Canes has to be, none other than Jaccob Slavin.

Slavin is the quite one that gets things done. Whenever there is a defensive break down who is there to save the day? Jaccob Slavin. The all around most solid player that Rod Brind’Amour can rely on to be shut down defensively has to be Slavin.

This being said, Slavin also doesn’t have much of a presence on social media, and isn’t regularly mixed in with the antics of Hamilton, Svechnikov, or Martinook.

Every now and then, however, Slavin does step out of his comfort zone and has a little fun. But for the most part, Slavin keeps the Canes in line and makes the most sense. He also is a new father, so he is literally Mr. Dad.

Red Foreman, Eric’s Dad, was always stubborn, bald and grumpy. Who fits this bill for the Carolina Hurricanes?

RESURRECTION – “Resurrection” stars Omar Epps (“House”) as Martin Bellamy, Matt Craven (“Crimson Tide,” “A Few Good Men”) as Fred, Devin Kelley (“Chernobyl Diaries,” “The Chicago Code”) as Gail, Frances Fisher (“Titanic”) as Lucille, Kurtwood Smith (“That ’70s Show”) as Harold, Sam Hazeldine (“The Raven”) as Abel, Samaire Armstrong (“Entourage,” “The O.C.”) as Elaine, Nicholas Gonzalez (“Off the Map”) as Connor, Mark Hildreth (“Dragon Ball Z”) as Tom and Landon Gimenez as Jacob. Written by Aaron Zelman (“Damages,” “The Killing”), “Resurrection” is executive-produced by Aaron Zelman, JoAnn Alfano, Dede Gardner, Jeremy Kleiner, Jon Liebman, Brillstein Entertainment and Plan B. The pilot was directed by Charles McDougall. “Resurrection” is produced by Walt Disney Television via Getty Images Studios. (Photo by Bob Mahoney/Walt Disney Television via Getty Images)KURTWOOD SMITH, MATT CRAVEN
RESURRECTION – “Resurrection” stars Omar Epps (“House”) as Martin Bellamy, Matt Craven (“Crimson Tide,” “A Few Good Men”) as Fred, Devin Kelley (“Chernobyl Diaries,” “The Chicago Code”) as Gail, Frances Fisher (“Titanic”) as Lucille, Kurtwood Smith (“That ’70s Show”) as Harold, Sam Hazeldine (“The Raven”) as Abel, Samaire Armstrong (“Entourage,” “The O.C.”) as Elaine, Nicholas Gonzalez (“Off the Map”) as Connor, Mark Hildreth (“Dragon Ball Z”) as Tom and Landon Gimenez as Jacob. Written by Aaron Zelman (“Damages,” “The Killing”), “Resurrection” is executive-produced by Aaron Zelman, JoAnn Alfano, Dede Gardner, Jeremy Kleiner, Jon Liebman, Brillstein Entertainment and Plan B. The pilot was directed by Charles McDougall. “Resurrection” is produced by Walt Disney Television via Getty Images Studios. (Photo by Bob Mahoney/Walt Disney Television via Getty Images)KURTWOOD SMITH, MATT CRAVEN /

Red Foreman was quite the angry fellow. While there are not any really angry Canes, Red did also put his foot down and was very stern with the kids. He was always ruling with an iron fist and wouldn’t take no for an answer.

While some of this pent-up anger could have come from how he was raised, Red meant well and did what he had to for his family.

RALEIGH, NC – NOVEMBER 21: Jordan Staal #11 of the Carolina Hurricanes skates with the puck during an NHL game against the Philadelphia Flyers on November 21, 2019 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images)
RALEIGH, NC – NOVEMBER 21: Jordan Staal #11 of the Carolina Hurricanes skates with the puck during an NHL game against the Philadelphia Flyers on November 21, 2019 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images) /

This has to be none other than Jordan Staal. While Joel Edmundson was a front runner due to all of his penalty minutes, Staal won the battle with his hair cut. Staal’s flow was amazing and he just had to go and cut it all off.

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But in reality, let’s take a deeper look. Staal is our captain and we stand by him. He will do whatever he can to help his teammates through tough times. Staal might not have exactly an iron fist to rule by, but he has stepped into this leadership role rather nicely, and really stepped up for the guys day in and day out since earning the “C”.

Staal probably feels a little bit of pressure to be as great as Eric was for the Canes. He probably holds this chip on his back just like Red held the chip on him because his dad was so hard on him. But at the end of the day, everyone looks up to Staal, and he does whatever he can for the guys.

Kitty Foreman, Eric’s mom, was easily the most lovable character on the show. Which Carolina Hurricane is most like her?

NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 29: Topher Grace and ebra Jo Rupp (costars on TV’s “That 70’s Show”) attend the opening night party for “Becoming Dr. Ruth” at The Westside Theatre on October 29, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by Bruce Glikas/FilmMagic)
NEW YORK, NY – OCTOBER 29: Topher Grace and ebra Jo Rupp (costars on TV’s “That 70’s Show”) attend the opening night party for “Becoming Dr. Ruth” at The Westside Theatre on October 29, 2013 in New York City. (Photo by Bruce Glikas/FilmMagic) /

Kitty was always laughing, having fun, and rarely got angry. She was such a lovable character that cared for everyone and all of the kids loved her.

Kitty was not really known for her motherly role, but rather being spontaneous and spouting random lines that would make everyone laugh. So who does this on the Canes?

RALEIGH, NC – OCTOBER 29: Sebastian Aho #20 of the Carolina Hurricanes skates during warmups prior to an NHL game against the Calgary Flames on October 29, 2019 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images)
RALEIGH, NC – OCTOBER 29: Sebastian Aho #20 of the Carolina Hurricanes skates during warmups prior to an NHL game against the Calgary Flames on October 29, 2019 at PNC Arena in Raleigh, North Carolina. (Photo by Gregg Forwerck/NHLI via Getty Images) /

Hear me out on this one. Sebastian Aho. Aho is always making us laugh, from his short style interviews to his goofy faces. How can you not love this kid? Aho isn’t exactly a motherly figure, but has moments of outburst and one-liners that leave us laughing to our gut; like when he called Justin Williams “daddy.”

Aho is one of a kind and we love him for that.

So there is your crew, if they were in a 90’s sitcom based out of Wisconsin. The loss wasn’t all that much of a positive note last night so hopefully you can find some joy in this little bit.

Question for CC readers: What other show could these boys be from and who would be whom?

Next. The Carolina Hurricanes Need to Make Some Changes. dark

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