Well Caniacs, as if you need another reminder that the Carolina Hurricanes aren’t in the playoffs again this year, I’m about to give you one. Don’t think of this as rubbing it in, think of it as therapeutic.
Now that the season is over, I’ll be giving you one of these fun top 16 lists each weekend. (Can you guess why 16?? I’m sure you can if you follow me on Twitter). And speaking of Twitter, feel free to suggest topics for these lists to me @CaniacCaz.
16. You added up every NHL teams points – just in case someone did the math wrong.
15. You DVR every Hurricanes game and watch them in order, pretending like you’ve never seen them before.
14. You keep doing all your pre-game rituals. Every day. Just in case.
13. You hang out at Carolina Ale House every night waiting for Stormy and the Storm Squad to show up.
12. You watch only playoff teams with red unis – and squint the entire time. With the television muted.
11. You avoid Twitter completely for the whole summer so you can’t see your favorite Cane talking about where they are or what they are doing.
10. You go to Raleigh Center Ice for open skate and yell “CAM WARD SAYS NO!!!” at every person that skates by.
9. You go to Harris Teeter for a sandwich, and refuse to leave until a Hurricane makes your sub.
8. You go to a baseball game with a cowbell and try to start a “Let’s Go Canes!” chant.
7. You round up all the kids in your neighborhood, buy them hockey gear, appoint a Captain and two Alternates and force them to play street hockey each Friday and Saturday.
6. You drive to the PNC Arena every Friday and Saturday night and tailgate…alone.
5. You bet money on the Canes winning the Stanley Cup.
4. You will only watch the Rangers, Penguins, or Kings in the playoffs. Because if you hear Staal or Sutter it must be the Canes right?
3. You adopt three dogs, name them Skinner, Jokinen and Ruutu. When you take them for walks, Skinner must always be in the left, Jokinen in the center, and Ruutu on the right. When people ask you why you simply explain you must keep the Skins and Finns line together.
2. You try to give coworkers an Anthony Stewart celebration hug after completing important projects.
1. You strike up conversations with Canes look-a-likes around town in Raleigh. “Hey is that Pat Dwyer in line in front of me at Starbucks?” “Look! It’s Jamie McBain enjoying a chicken sandwich with his friends at Chick-fil-A!”
Maybe you are experiencing one of these “symptoms” of a Canes-less playoff season. I’m certainly not a doctor, but I recommend just going to sleep until around September.